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Monday, May 30, 2011

Symposium of the Decades Part 5: If this is good it'll be a miracle

9/11. Every American knows these words, and knows them well. That single day changed well, just about everything. It defined the decade one way or another, starting the war on terror leading to many thousands of deaths and trillions of dollars worth of military spending. The special effects have become so amazing that something like Avatar (2009) could be made, a film almost entirely CGI, yet still looking realistic compared to the people. By the end of the decade the uncanny value had almost been conquered, and it paved the way for new genres of film. Big budget franchises were the name of the game, as the industry became more and more profitable, and audiences got draw in further and further.

Donnie Darko (2001): The first film is a generic romantic comedy, a genre that was extremely prevalent during this decade. Some of the best reviewed films of the decade were deconstructions of this genre, and this, along with Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, are some of the best of that type. A cult film which gained popularity through the roots of the internet; a surrealist film in an era which was just not quite ready. A masterful piece of film-making that inspired many, many indie films in the future, Donnie Darko is one of the defining films in its genre.

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2001, 2002, and 2003): I don’t think this one needs too much explanation. The battle scenes created a new definition for epic, and as a successful adaptation of a famous book series it lead the way for many, many imitators, the worst of which was probably 2006’s Eragon. There’s no doubt the amount of impact LoTR had, quite probably inspiring another powerful trilogy, Pirates of the Caribbean. The films themselves are not cinematic masterpieces, but the set pieces are suitably impressive, and suit the effects well, offering all the genre can really show, and demonstrating that an adaptation does not have to be bad.

Kill Bill (2003 & 2004): These films were one story released in two volumes, because of the initial 4 hour runtime. The two parts compliment as well as contrast themselves, with the first almost non-stop action, and the second having less than minute long fights, and an enormous amount of dialogue. The ending too is indicative of the decade as a whole, ending on a sombre note, as true victory is not really had, an interesting comment about Bush’s “Mission Accomplished”. It’s almost a case of ultra-violence, especially the first half, compared favourably to A Clockwork Orange. Kubrick and Tarantino can be compared, as both craft their films with such purpose, every scene necessary, and masterfully shot. Said to eventually be a trilogy, it will be a site to see when the bride rides again.

No Country for Old Men (2007): The Coen Brother’s only Best Picture, and it’s a doozy; the tale of a briefcase full of money, a recurring theme in the brother’s pictures. The film is shot very slowly, shots panning and deliberating, never rushing. Like the main antagonist, a personification of death, the film plods along, never ceasing, relentless in the pursuit of an obsolete goal. It is a film about predestination, and the avoidance of fate. The main character dies off screen. It shows that he is not important, that death waits for no man, and the protagonist and antagonist never actually meet. It is a very post-modern film, and that is the way that storytelling is going these days.

As for a defining film of the decade, I think the point to note is there was no one film. The decade changed so much, but nothing was consistent, every facet of life adapted to this new universe, and everything changed along with it. There are numerous documentary films that bare mention, An Inconvenient Truth bringing global warming to the masses on an unprecedented scale, Fahrenheit 9/11 dealing with the ever important issue of terrorism, and Thank You For Smoking further reinforcing the negative effects the industry has on everyone. But the defining film of the decade was in fact you, everyone. Youtube has made it so everyday videos get millions of views, everyone believes that everyone else wants to see what they have to say, or do, and sometimes they are right. So the defining film is home movies through Youtube, and everyone should feel very proud of themselves.

The days have passed where information was hidden from the public. With Wikileaks and twitter and blogs, all information is available to anyone with internet access. The world has changed, immensely, everything is different. People are connected more and more, and this has changed the way we look at life. Now a presidential candidate will be examined from every possible angle, anyone they ever met will be known and interviewed, and privacy is a thing of the past. Big brother is watching you, and he is very disappointed in you.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Falcon Punch

 Sucker Punch is a feminist film. The males are one dimensional caricatures, compared to the fully flesh out females. This is at an utter contrast to what everyone was expecting, and subverts the expectations of the audience, a goal that it set out to achieve, as evidenced by the title. I realize this is not exactly topical, but I couldn't really express what I felt until now.

The movie follows the Joss Whedon school of feminism, hot girls kicking ass. However by having the males in the film either incompetent, or straight villainous a different image than what the previews showed and what many fans went into expecting. The film subverts expectations and panders to the fan-boys, but also insults them. The scenes of action that appeared to be blatant pandering were all part of the intricate dance that is the film.

On the surface it appears to be the standard popcorn flick, with attractive women, explosive action, and a paper thin plot, but this is not at all the case. These preconceived notions could in part due to director Zack Snyder's previous extremely testosterone filled affair, 300 . On the third level of reality in the film this would be true, but looking at the film at a whole it is a feminine film, about the struggles of one girl, and here attempts to be a good big sister.

Now the action scenes are amazing, and the soundtrack fits it amazingly well, but that is not the point. The point is that it is just fantasy, an escape from the real world, and the hardships within. The movie actually has two levels of fantasy, and the 50's brothel is just the second layer. All the viewers of the brothel are the fan-boys, "the men in the dark are us", the film comments on the sexism that appears to be inherent in the culture, breaking it down piece by piece.

The film is not for everyone, the plot can be confusing, and some will compare it to Inception. This is wrong, the themes they deal with are completely different, and the purpose of the action is completely different, as well as the feelings of both films. Overall though I highly recommend seeing it, if only just once, because it is an incredibly polarizing film that needs to be seen for an opinion to be made, because honestly, no one can tell you whether you like a film or not, you have to decide it for yourself.

Friday, May 20, 2011

Symposium on the Decades Part 4: The Final Chapter

The 90s, a decade extremely relevant to me given that I was in fact alive during most of it. This was the Generation X type stuff, the era when the Simpsons started, though that was technically ’89, and a new era in filmmaking. It was a relatively peaceful decade, the Cold War had just ended and the War on Terror was yet to begin. This decade housed some of my favourite films, and with the dawn of the internet independent films were given more coverage, information began to be shared globally fairly quickly. The TV, games, and music were all easily recognizable, and the 90s was the beginning of my generation, an important personal touch needed to make it oh so special.

Jurrassic Park (1993): The first proper live action dinosaur film, one which amazed audiences with realistic robot monstrosities, and created a new standard for computer generated imagery, for bettor or for worse. The number of films it influenced is enormous, allowing for the future works of James Cameron, Lucas’ much reviled prequel trilogy, and Peter Jackson’s epic LoTR trilogy. The fear of ‘velociraptors’ is one that has been ingrained into the mind of many a kid of the 90s, particularly evidenced by xkcd creator Randall Munroe. Overall an extremely influential film that showed us what we had all been wanting for decades, through the innovative use of new technology, a statement to the path the 90s would take.

Pulp Fiction (1994): Pulp Fiction is Quentin Tarantino’s Magnum Opus, an innocuous film for the new generation. Its timeline is confused, the events are all insignificant in the grand scheme which doesn’t exist, and the characters are drug abusing sweraholics. This is what makes it such a great film. It was an enormously popular film, quite possibly popularizing the creation of indy films, regardless of whether or not this actually was. The dialogue is Seinfeldian in many parts, the film is self-referential as well as paying homage to dozens of past films, popular or not all based on Tarantino’s exhaustive knowledge of cinema, as well peculiar sense of direction. It got snubbed for Best Picture because of Forest Gump, but has been indoctrinated into the minds of teenagers of the 90s, and remains a timeless film.

Toy Story (1995): What can I say about Pixar’s first full length motion picture and the first fully CGI film too. The particular influence in this film can be easily felt in recent days with the glut of CGI films coming out recently, the peak one could say was Avatar, which while not fully animated, was almost entirely done so. The storyline is just that of a boy and his toys, nothing epic, just them wanting to get home, something easily relatable. Also Joss Whedon helped to write the film, giving it his unique touch. This film lead to both Pixar’s popularity, all with their exacting standards of excellence, as well as leading to two excellent sequels, something almost entirely unprecedented. It helped to represent the innocence of a generation, at an utter contrast to the rest of the films, but it is something that is necessary for a good society.

The Big Lebowski (1998): One of the Cowen Brother’s best films, featuring utterly surreal dream sequences and a plot about bowling and lies. The Dude, the protagonist, is the quintessential example of sloth. He does nothing to make his money, and he bowls, the only reason he gets involved in the events of the film is that some guys mistake him for someone else. The entire plot is lies and misinformation, and it starts because of a misunderstanding. It has become the basis for a philosophy on life and perfectly represents the slacker attitude of the 90s, and the greed inherent in society.

The Matrix (1999): An action film that dives into philosophical issues and looks at the issue of what is reality. By the Wachowskis, not that anyone else could do it. The first film especially was revolutionary in that it popularized the sort of action that has become the standard. The cinematic use of bullet time, the stylized wire frame for the kung fu scenes, and the ability to deal with complicated psychological issues through an action film have all become popular ideas because of this film. The numerous allusions are alike to many of Tarantino’s films, and the extended Alice in Wonderland metaphor provides a contrast to the violence in the film.

The 90s were an amazing decade in the film industry, having the third and most recent winner of the big 5, Silence of the Lambs, and introducing Tarantino to the world. Numerous other great films like Clerks, Fargo, Terminator 2, Beauty and the Beast, and all the films in the Disney Renaissance. The real defining film of the decade though was Pulp Fiction, an amazing film that shows the sex, violence, and drugs in the culture, with a simple perfect film.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

To Go Farther Than Any Man Has Gone Before

Fargo is a Coen Brother's film, a very black comedy, and good at what it does. It is set in the freezing wastes of Minnesota, and establishes a setting which seems homey and comforting, creating an enormous contrast to the events of the film. It follows one man and his attempt to kidnap his wife and claim an enormous bounty from her rich father. Interestingly the protagonist of the story is not introduced until about half an hour in. The main character, the villain of the story, seems like such a pathetic human being, and his accent makes it seem like hes a likeable guy. He has that classic Minnesota accent that makes him so... non threatening. It's the classic misunderstanding leading to catastrophe that pervades so many comedies.

Fargo is a comedy of errors, of murder, and of lies. The entire movie is a lie, but for a reason. The opening of the film states that it is based on a true story. This is false, the Coens' claim it came a little bit from everything, all the death and lies and sex in the world, but it is still a lie. These lies pervade the film as they pervade our lives. Everything about the film is planned, everything that looks thrown together, like the random deaths, the needlessness of the deaths, it is all part of the message.

This message is not a happy one, but it is not a sad one. Just that life is messed up, everything and everyone, but there are some people who, despite all that, still try, and these good people are what we need to get by. The central message, theme, whatever, is perfectly shown when at the end of all that, the protagonist police women just wonders why someone would do all that, kill that many people for just a little money. "There is more to life than money", she says, a traditional moral in an amoral world.

The entire film is about greed, about money, about those who live by it and die by it. At one point Steve Buscemi's character argues over the matter of a few hundred dollars, when he had over 900 thousand waiting for him a few miles away. Even though it doesn't actually matter, the principle is that he must have everything he wants, all the money, all the power. This film of greed continues through many of the Coens' films, with the false ransom in the Big Lebowski, and the briefcase full of money in No Country for Old Men.

Greed is one of the 7 deadly sins, and this movie shows just how much shit it can cause. Let's finish this up. The world is a fucked up place, people die for no god damn reason, and god is not going to do shit about it. People though, people can do things, they can make a difference, with all the pain, and death, and hardships that choice, to make a difference, to help and not hinder, is what makes all the difference.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Symposium of the Decades Part 3: In 3-D! Or not

The 80s, a decade like no other. Of course the same could be said of all the decades, though I got my suspicions about the 10s and 20s. The style, culture, and attitude was very different to what it is now. This was a happier era, despite perpetual troubles in the Middle East, the Soviet Union collapsed, and a new era in technology began with computers becoming more and more widespread. Teen comedies, B horror films, and cheesy action movies perpetuated the years. It introduced so many now universal actors like Schwarzenegger, Eddie Murphy, Nicholas Cage, and Sylvester Stallone. Without further ado, the films.

Alien (1979): Now technically this is not an 80s film, it was made in the late 70s and even released then too. But watching this film, this is not a 70s film, everything about it from the effects to the way its shot to the actors themselves screams 80s. So here we have one of the best good quality horror films, a contrast to many of the other horror films of the decade, focusing on buckets of blood as opposed to psychological horror. One of the most important parts of this film is, like Jaws, you rarely see the thing, nothing is scarier than the unknown. It created a standard that has been rarely lived up to let alone exceeded, and it has defined horror for all the years to come.

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981): I kind of hate to have two Lucas films on these lists, but his films were just so damn influential that it had to be included. A classic adventure story, featuring an opening sequence that has become so inured into the public consciousness that even those who haven’t seen the film know of it, it is truly a revolutionary film. Whoever thought an archaeologist could become such an icon. Similar to what the Half Life series has done for theoretical physicists, Raiders started many people on the path to the ‘exciting’ field of archaeology. Millions were disappointed.  Even still, the film has had an immense impact, refining a genre, and creating a character who has become a cultural icon for a generation, as well as furthering Harrison Ford’s career, a move which guarantees it can not be a bad film.

Nightmare on Elm Street (1984): Here we have another horror film, this one a bit less physiological, and more buckets of blood. In one scene the cops are carrying literal buckets of blood away from the untimely death of Johnny Depp. It also popularized the slasher genre created a few years earlier with Halloween. This resulted in numerous imitators and sequels, but none quite as successful as the original. It also blurred the line between dreams and reality, stabbing the fourth wall just a little bit. Some feel it is Freudian in a way, but then some also feel that Alien is, so most of that is really a crapshoot. What this movie will be remembered most for, and what it influenced the most though is its death scenes, truly terrific in all meanings of the word.

The Breakfast Club (1985): One of those cliché teen comedies that I was talking about earlier, but one of the first and the best. There were a lot of films which could have fit in here, 16 Candles, Pretty in Pink, Ferris Bueller’s day off, but what really makes this film unique is the location. A good 90% of it is just in one library, as the group of teenagers with irreconcilable differences eventually learn to appreciate their individuality, and to love and respect one another. Like I said, cliché beyond belief, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t well made, with good actors and the script to back it up. It had an enormous impact on the pop culture of a decade, and all the teen movies that attempted to follow its success. A defining film, and the best of its genre, truly a film for the ages.

The rest of these movies I was fairly sure about, but the fifth film was a huge process. I could name about ten films which could fit in here, like Brazil, Scarface, E.T., Empire Strikes Back, Back to the Future, Ghostbusters, Terminator, Evil Dead II, The Shining, The Blues Brothers, First Blood, Rocky IV, but I ended up with only one choice.

Die Hard (1988): Now I will argue that this is actually a 90s movie, regardless of the date it was released, but I realize now it was in fact one of the final good 80s film, a fine transition to the 90s. The best Christmas movie, no questions asked, but also one of the best action films of the decades, accomplishing something that the many explosions of Commando, or First Blood could not. One human character was all they really needed, someone the audience could relate to, not a superman but an everyday guy. This decision changed so much in the genre, creating all the “Die hard on a ____” movies that sought to emulate a tiny fraction of its success. This was Bruce Willis’ role, and it is the only role he has been able to play for the last 22 years. Sad, but true, he wasn’t acting, that was simply the director putting him in a building with some terrorists (or not) and filming it.

And that’s it, the films that helped to define a decade. If any genre was to define the decade, it would be the teen comedies. Never before, or after, was there such a great slate of films that seem like they should be similar and terrible, but aren’t. The romantic comedies of today can’t hope to compare to the genius of the Breakfast Club, the film that defined a decade.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Tales from the Toilet

Pulp Fiction was a film released by Quentin Tarantino in 1994, and has since been widely received as a cult classic, paradoxical as that may seem. What I'm talking about specifically here though, is how the world can change when we duck out of it for a second. This is evidenced by the use of bathrooms in Pulp Fiction, something ignored by just about every other film. Toilets are seen six times throughout the film, each preceding an important event, and directly or indirectly influencing it. All these show how the world is that of a changing environment, and that leaving only for a moment can have the biggest impact of all.

The first instance of the bathroom being used is by one Mrs. Mia Wallace, in Jack Rabbit Slim's. She goes to "powder her nose" and shows that she has an enormous drug problem, causing her to OD later in the film, starting a long chain of events. As she returns from the bathroom she comments on the phenomena of bathrooms, stating how it is "lucky to have food waiting for her", indirectly addressing the wider issue of how life can change as one examines it through an outside perspective, taking a moment, and that is all that is necessary, to observe one's situation from a decent distance, and to see what changes happen that are invisible to our naked eyes.

The next occurrence is soon after, as Vincent contemplates just what the hell he is going to do with Mia, given they are both high and drunk, and if anything major happens there is a good chance he will be thrown out a window, an occurrence quite explicitly detailed earlier on. Mia unfortunately tries to snort some heroine, resulting in a rather unfortunate situation, and a changing world after only a minute away. This speaks to the film as a whole, as the different disordered segments can be disorienting, when one story disappears only to reappear at a later time. The haphazard nature of all of this still seems very planned, possibly to simulate the eternal clockwork of life and its turns and twists.

The next two bathroom sequences occur in the golden watch tale, that of a boxer who killed  a man, and now seeks asylum from all the people out to get him. One instance simply helps to show intimacy between a  couple, providing contrast to the rape which happens later, quite an opposite indeed.  The other instance close to that one, is Vincent's final hurrah, as he steps out of the bathroom to find his death staring straight at him, as all his past deeds are catching up to him in this single instance of a man with a gun. He realizes this, and wonders just why everything had happened, as the disaster of his life is fully realized, the violence inherent in his profession is truly revealed in his own end, and Jules' interpretation of events may have been right. Wandering the earth doesn't sound so bad compared to the end.

Chronologically this event in the bathroom happened first, but in the film it is one of the last scenes. We have our Jerry Seinfeld look-alike waiting in the bathroom with a revolver "bigger than he is", listening to his friends die, himself dying on the inside. Soon thereafter he charges out firing rapidly, hitting nothing, and finding that his end was inevitable. This however does bring about Jules' reflections on God, miracles, and his profession, so some good did come of it. One life ends, another begins anew, as the world is changed completely, because one guy decided he need to take a piss. This is all best summarized by Jule's misquoting of a bible verse, Ezekiel 25:17, guiding the innocent through the valley of darkness as a Shepard.

The last, and perhaps least significant, is when Vincent retreats to the diner's safe haven, and comes out to find a hold up. Perhaps the most material of all these visits in its end result, it is still a very important moment for Jules, and the beginning of the end for Vincent. By finding these robbers, Honey Bunny and Ringo, we find the insatiable human need for material goods, and what lengths some people are willing to go to to get them. Jules here decides to give all the money away, including that of the other customers, in his attempt at charity, allowing them to live, and perhaps changing the way their lives will progress. Both him and Vincent then exit to the film's eponymous theme tune, and depart, one to his death, and one to a new life, all springing from a few moments which change everything.

So bathrooms seem insignificant in comparison to the larger themes of many works, including this one, but maybe something so necessary and yet glossed over or ignored in near every work is one of the most important. Often the things we forget are the ones which we truly need, evidenced by the Golden Watch, and sometimes the one thing we are searching for we can never truly find, like in Moby Dick. It all comes back to the little things, the unimportant details that mount up to an insurmountable pile of shit, reeking of forgetfulness, and the eternally lost miasmas of life.

Monday, May 2, 2011

A Symposium on the Decades Part 2: The Return of the Rotten Tomatos

The 70s were another time of change, the Vietnam War was in full swing, and not everybody was happy about it. The civil rights movement was over, but so was the fervor of the space race, and many looked fondly back on the innocence of the 60s. Many crises of energy and oil foreboded grim times to come, and Richard Nixon was finally unseated. The films I chose I feel best represent the more serious elements of the decade, while still encompassing the lighter parts of life.

The Godfather Part 1 & Part 2(1972 & 1974): Ah the Godfather, truly a masterpiece of cinema, greatly outshining the book it was based on, and actually changing the way the mafia thought of themselves. Few items of media can claim that they actually changed their subject matter, though this is one of them. I have decided to lump in both the original and part 2 in this one section, because they are really two parts of one film, and they retain similar levels of acclaim, one of the few sequels to do so. The art of cinema may have not been revolutionized by these films, but the countless imitators show just how much of an impact it has had.

Young Frankenstein (1974):  Mel Brooks produced two films in 1974, this and Blazing Saddles, but I believe that this film was really his Magnus Opus, nothing in it is slapdash, or incidental, it is all ordained. As a film shot in black and white it is an oddity, especially in this period, but Brooks was adamant about it, and a better film is developed because of his adherence to the 30s tropes and style of filmmaking. More subdued than many comedies, using more of a British style of humor than an American, resulting in a very unique film compared to what was on at the time. This film was not a major influence, nor a milestone, but it was a nod to the past, something many films in the decade sought to emulate, descending back to what was archaic for exaggerated effect.

Jaws (1975): Jaws was the movie that created the summer blockbuster, a phenomenon that has exploded in the recent years, and like the Godfather, had a huge impact in real life. This was the film that made people terrified of the ocean, of lakes, of even their own baths; such was the brilliance of one of Spielberg’s first films. Much of this was actually due to technical limitations, in that the shark they had was not up to his standards, and so was hidden for much of the film, creating the tense situation which put audiences on the edge of their seats. If Jaws was made today it would use CGI for the shark; creating what would inevitably be a weaker film. This is a movie that could be made at no other time, and one which helped to define the further decades.

Star Wars (1977): Everyone knows Star Wars, what has become a household name was originally a one off that had little hopes of succeeding, much like the original Final Fantasy. The film that created a billion dollar franchise, brought sci-fi into the mainstream paving the way for numerous other films and one that brought the classic hero’s journey archetype to a mainstream audiences is truly something to be remembered. Even though its immediate sequel would embrace the most critical acclaim, the original is the one that is remembered by all and one film that managed to define a decade.

Out of all the films I have described only the Godfather duology have won the best picture academy award, which shows just how little the academy awards really mean. The movies that define a decade are a mix of genres, styles, and messages, because that is what life really is, a mix of drama and tragedy and horror and adventure. It all comes together to form one cohesive muck. So the quintessential movie of the decade, that would be Star Wars, a space epic that showed how science fiction could be a popular genre, or at the very least fantasy set in space, and led to a great renaissance in special effects, and the advent of merchandising on an entirely new level.

PS: Sorry for the links to TV Tropes

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Babbity Rabbity and the Time Warp

Donnie Darko

This is not a review, but a discussion, a score at the end will not be given, but I will look at what makes a film, and why this makes it so. This is entirely made out of opinions, and wikipedian facts will not get in the way of the feelings of my gut. Without any further ado, what makes it a film worth watching.

Donnie Darko is a romantic film, dealing with the issues of predestination as well as far less important issues like how the Smurfs live without dicks. This is all wrapped up in the cover of a psychological thriller, but given Frank's line "Why are you wearing that stupid man suit" it would seem that appearances are not nearly as important as the actual substance behind it. This results in a cult classic of a film, much beloved by audiences who never saw it.

The music used in the film varies a huge amount, just like the content, with frequent switches between the insane drama of a paranoid schizophrenic and the exploits of an ordinary teenage boy. The most memorable image in the film is one iconic to its persona, the rabbit, Frank. This image will certainly outlast the film it comes from, even though it is intelligent beyond what many films of the decade are. But that damn bunny will haunt the dreams and nightmares of a generation, much like the clown in It did for the previous. Incidentally the mother in the film is reading the novel of It, a nice little pop culture shout out, one of many in the film.

But the real issue dealt with is that of free will, and predestination, and what the hell does God, or a god have to do with any of it. Donnie plays the role of cynic, insane, but he knows it. The rest of the world appears relatively sane, but underneath that bunny suit lies only pain and death. This is the message, if, given the opportunity, you would sacrifice yourself, and the known, for an unknown never to be known by you. This is key to the romance between Donnie and Gretchen, as there is never a perfect option given, one of them has to die.

The seinfeldian conservations occurring at the earlier parts of the film stand at an utter contrast to the insanity of the end as the deadline draws ever closer. 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, 12 seconds. An insignificant number for a significant film. All it really adds up to is 82. The multilayered story involving a short story studied not quite detailing Donnie's past adventures, and a book hinted to explain everything explaining nothing to the audience. The knowledge of misinformation is key to the discussion of predestination, if we know are destinies and follow them, are we any different than the ignorant masses who don't know and follow them still? This is never fully answered, as nothing really is, but encourages thinking, something woefully devoid in many films.

And allow me to leave on a positive note, not involving the death of a good portion of a family, nor a love, nor a friend. But a few simple words which affect know one, meaning nothing and yet oh so very much. It's all about the cellar door. A couple of words that form a couplet, and which describe a gateway to a new place, or just a few words which sound mighty nice. So the portal opens, and the portal closes, and at the end all you're really left with is a cellar door.

Score: One fucked up bunny, one fucked up kid, and one fucked up life. Best romantic comedy of the decade.